Islam does not ask a grieving person to pretend the loss is small. It teaches words of return, patience, and hope for reward when news of death or calamity arrives.
Innama ashku baththi wa huzni ila-llah.
“I only complain of my suffering and my grief to Allah.”
Ya'qub said this in his long grief for Yusuf (AS). Grief is not hidden from Allah (SWT); it is brought to Him.
Rabbi inni a'udhu bika an as'alaka ma laysa li bihi 'ilm, wa illa taghfir li wa tarhamni akun mina-l-khasirin.
“My Lord, I seek refuge in You from asking You for that of which I have no knowledge. And unless You forgive me and have mercy on me, I will be among the losers.”
Nuh (AS) said this after Allah (SWT) told him not to ask about his son, who had drowned with the disbelievers.
Inna lillahi wa inna ilayhi raji'un.
“Indeed we belong to Allah, and to Him we return.”
Inna lillahi wa inna ilayhi raji'un. Allahumma'jurni fi musibati wa akhlif li khayran minha.
“Indeed we belong to Allah, and to Him we return. O Allah, reward me for my affliction and replace it for me with something better than it.”
The complete supplication taught for the first shock of loss: affirming that we belong to Allah (SWT), asking for reward through the pain, and trusting Him for a better replacement in the way He knows best.
Allahumma inni a'udhu bika mina-l-hammi wa-l-hazan, wa-l-'ajzi wa-l-kasal, wa-l-jubni wa-l-bukhl, wa dala'i-d-dayn, wa ghalabati-r-rijal.
“O Allah, I seek refuge in You from worry and grief, incapacity and laziness, cowardice and miserliness, the burden of debt, and being overpowered by people.”
A comprehensive Prophetic dua addressing emotional pressure and the practical forces that can deepen it: helplessness, inaction, fear, withholding, debt, and being overpowered.
Inna lillahi ma akhadh, wa lahu ma a'ta, wa kullu shay'in 'indahu bi-ajalin musamma... fal-tasbir wal-tahtasib
“To Allah belongs what He took, and to Him belongs what He gave, and everything with Him has an appointed term... so let her be patient and hope for Allah's reward.”
The Prophet ﷺ sent this to his daughter when her child was dying. Speaking to the bereaved directly, say fasbir wahtasib to a man or fasbiri wahtasibi to a woman. The wording A'dhama-llahu ajrak in Hisn al-Muslim is from scholars, not a hadith, and is left out.